Irvine: “I know! I mean, is looking at animals supposed to be fun or something?”
Originally Published: 6/15/01 . 24 pages
Synopsis
Lucretia wants to go on a family trip to the zoo, but Hojo and Sephiroth aren’t loving the idea. Can she make them the family she always wanted? The ramble gang goes along to find out.
Ramble Milestones
Nothing this time.
This zoo is based on the Bronx Zoo, which is the zoo I grew up visiting. The safari train Seifer, Zell and the girls ride is based on this ride that zoo has called the Bengali Express. I almost never spotted any animals as a kid riding it. They were wisely hiding in the bushes. This one has some humor mixed in with it’s drama, and it’s not very long, which is good, because I was working with a lot of one note joke here.
(in the ramble room we have lark, noelle, Ashley, vincent, tseng, reeve, barret, cid, red, seifer, zell, irvine and reno, who are staring at lark looking dumbfounded…well, most of them anyway)
Noelle: “We’re going to the *zoo*?”
Ashley: “Why?”
Lark: “…..Because….it’ll….uh…be fun.”
Noelle: “You hate the zoo.”
Lark: “No I don’t. That’s Shell.”
Ashley: “That’s both of you.”
Lark: “….Well we’re going anyway! Whether I like it or not!”
Barret: “Yo! Maybe we be able to find dis here tree stump’s friends.” *points to red*
Red: “A tree stump? B-but that is not even alive!”
Cid: “@#$%#$^$&^%&^%*$^&#!”
Barret: “Yo, you said it, Cid. Shu’ up, tree stump.”
Red: “Please… I have no rings…”
Zell: “I wanna see a hippo!”
Seifer: “Didn’t you just visit your family, Zell?” *snort*
Zell: “Hey!!” *flips out*
Reno: *slipping his flask into his jacket* “Well, I’m ready.”
Irvine: *doing the same* “Me too.”
Reeve: *counting off the things as he puts them in his fanny pack* “Okay, I have my wallet, and the camera, and anti-bacterial soap, and those 20% off coupons, my cell phone of course and–“
Tseng: *puts a hand on his shoulder* “Reeve, we’re going to the zoo. We’re not scaling Mt. Nibel.”
Lark: “Well let’s go.” *looks at vincent* “Are you okay?”
Vincent: *sigh* “I just wish I could go with him.”
(lark pats him on the arm reassuringly and he smiles at her a little.)
………………………………………………………………………………………
(meanwhile, in loser land…)
Heidegger: “Gya haa haa! Zooy!”
Kuja: *dressed up like safari barbie* “I’m glad I can finally put this outfit to use.”
Scarlet: “I can’t believe that stupid skank Lucretia came back! I mean, she’s worse than me! She slept with Hojo, which is something even I would never do.”
Heidegger: “Gya haa haa! Because Hojo’s gay!”
Scarlet: “Shut up, Heidegger!” *throws a high heel at his head*
Nida: *excitedly* “I love the zoo! I haven’t been in a long time! I wanna see the lions and the tigers and the bears, and the koalas, and the pandas, and the elephants and the rhinos and the hippos and the giraffes and the polar bears, and the monkeys and—“
Scarlet: “Shut up, dumbass!”
Nida: *pouts*
Kuja: “You know, Hojo did not seem too happy when he left this morning.”
Scarlet: *blinks* “You actually took notice of his emotions?”
Kuja: “No. He didn’t try and sneak into my shower like he always does.”
Heidegger: “Gya haa haa! He’s screwed up!”
Nida: “Look who’s talking, weirdo!”
Scarlet: “Look, let’s just go now or we’re never gonna get there!”
(they start to walk towards the door, nida skipping merrily)
Nida: “We’re going to the zoo!”
………………………………………………………………………………………..
(meanwhile, at the zoo…lucretia’s buying tickets, and hojo and sephiroth are standing near one another, not speaking as they glare at each other, arms crossed)
Hojo: “Could you look more miserable?”
Sephiroth: *snaps* “Could you?”
(lucretia comes back, smiling)
Lucretia: “Well, I got the tickets. Are you boys ready?”
Hojo and Sephiroth: *still glaring at each other* “Yes.”
Lucretia: “We’re going to have a great day!” *she turns and starts walking in*
Hojo and Sephiroth: *still glaring as they follow* “Yeah.”
……………………………………………………………………………………..
(meanwhile, the others arrive at the zoo. reeve is studying the park map)
Ashley: “Are we gonna stay together, or split up?”
Zell: “I wanna go on the safari!”
Seifer: “Me too.”
Noelle: “But you never see anything on that thing.”
Zell: “But it’s cool! I’m going.”
Seifer: “I’m going *first*.”
Zell: “Are not!” *runs*
Seifer: “Come on, Ashley.” *grabs her by the wrist and starts dragging her after zell*
Ashley: “Come on, Noelle.” *grabs her wrist and drags her along too*
Noelle: “Aw, dammit!”
Lark: “Well, I guess we’re splitting up. The zoo isn’t that big.”
Barret: “Yo! We gonna find where flipper belongs!”
Red: “….Flipper was a dolphin.”
Cid: “#$%#^$&%%*^*^#$^@!”
Barret: “Yo, you tell ‘im, Cid! Now, come on, flipper! Faster than lightin’!”
(they grab red by the leash and start to literally drag him away)
Red: “If they return without me, check the cages!!”
Reno: *chuckling* “Flipper. Heh heh.”
Irvine: “Well, we’re off.”
Reno: “Yeah.”
Lark: “Where are you going?”
Irvine: “Well *duh*.”
Reno and Irvine: “Chick hunting!” *high five*
Lark: “Reno, you get arrested for statutory rape and I’m not bailing you out.”
Reno: “Don’t worry, Lark. We’ll be good.” *they go off*
Lark: *sigh* “Well, I guess that leaves us.”
Reeve: *searching through his fanny pack* “Where are those tic tacs?”
Tseng: *hits himself in the forehead*
Lark: “So… What do you guys wanna go see?”
Vincent: *miserable sigh* “I do not care.”
Lark: “Okay…. Tseng, do you have any ideas?”
Tseng: *holds up the tic tacs he’s taken from his pocket* “Here, Reeve. I had them.”
Reeve: “How did you get them?” *snatches them back* “Maybe I didn’t check if I had everything carefully enough…”
Lark: “Okay, this is gonna get us nowhere. I say we’re going to the house of darkness, because that’s the only part of the zoo I like.”
Reeve: *waves the park map* “Afterwards, can we go see the emus?”
Lark: *dryly* “Sure.”
………………………………………………………………………………………
(meanwhile, the losers have arrived…)
Nida: *eyes glowing* “Wow…the zoo…”
Heidegger: “Gya haa haa! I want popcorn!”
Scarlet: *fanning herself with the map* “Look at all these people with their happy little families.” *eyes narrow* “It makes me ill.”
Kuja: “Look at the way everyone is admiring my outfit.”
Scarlet: “They’re not admiring it. They’re giving you weird looks because you’re a man wearing a skirt!”
Kuja: “A very *pretty* man.” *pouts*
Scarlet: “Do we have to be seen with him??”
Heidegger: “Gya haa haa! The popcorn!”
Nida: *jumping up and down* “Come on! I wanna see the seals!”
Scarlet: “Fine. Let’s go see the damn seals and shut him up.”
Nida: “Can’t we just act normal for *one* day?”
Scarlet: *stomping towards the seals* “Tell that to the cross dresser and the freak who eats everything.”
Heidegger: *stuffing the park map into his mouth* “Gya haa haa! Mapilly delicious!”
………………………………………………………………………………………….
(meanwhile, back to sephiroth and his torture…lucretia is standing there, staring happily at some exhibit. sephiroth leans unhappily against the divider, and hojo just stands there, looking cross)
Lucretia: “Oh, this is so fun!” *clasps her hands together and looks at sephiroth* “Are you having fun, sweetheart?”
Sephiroth: *forced smile* “Yes, mother.”
Lucretia: *turns to hojo* “Alexander, is something the matter?”
Hojo: “No. Of course not, Lucretia.”
Lucretia: “I think we need to have a family talk.”
Sephiroth and Hojo: “…………….”
Lucretia: “What shall we talk about?”
Sephiroth: “Do we have to do this now?”
Hojo: “I’m not really in the mood to talk.”
Lucretia: “We are a *family*. And before the end of today I’m going to have you two talking to one another!” *pause* “Now come on. We’re going to see the elephants.” *she stomps off*
Hojo: “Oh look, son. You made your mother angry.”
Sephiroth: “F**k you.” *stomps off*
………………………………………………………………………………………….
(meanwhile, lark, vincent, tseng and reeve go into the house of darkness, and it’s really *really* dark. in fact, it’s so dark, that they can’t see an inch in front of them. the place isn’t too popular, so it’s otherwise empty, and they all stand just inside the entrance, looking around for *some* sign of light…)
Reeve: “Damn… I knew I should have put a flashlight in this fanny pack!”
Tseng: *sigh*
Vincent: “Hmm… This brings back memories.”
Lark: *sweat drop* “Okay, you guys, we can make it through this. Come on.” *pause* “Now….where…are you guys?”
(she starts to feel around, and her hand ends up grabbing something…)
Lark: “Ooh…whose ass is this?”
Tseng: “….That would be mine.”
Lark: “Oh, I figured. Hehe.”
Tseng: “Uh….Lark?”
Lark: “Aw, gimme a break. I have my Cop A Feel card in my pocket.”
Tseng: “Your what?”
Lark: “All us ramble girls have one!”
Guys: *unseen sweat drops*
Lark: “Well, I guess we should go on forward.”
(and so they start, but they keep bumping into one another because they really can’t see a blasted thing.)
Lark: “Ack!”
Reeve: “Sorry, Lark.”
Vincent: “Ouch.”
Tseng: “Oops, sorry.”
Lark: “…What the hell…?”
Tseng: *cough* “Uh, Lark, that’s my…”
Lark: “ACK! Oops! Sorry, Tseng. Heh. This isn’t working very well.” *pause* “Maybe we should all hold hands.”
(there’s a long pause where no one does anything but stand there, and the guys wait for lark to finish her thought)
Reeve: “Uh, Lark?”
Lark: “Oh! Sorry. I was waiting for someone to say ‘that’s gay’, but then I realized no one was gonna.” *reaches out and takes vincent’s hand* “Let’s go.”
……………………………………………………………………………………….
(meanwhile, across the zoo at the train…)
Zell: “So this train goes around and shows you all the cool animals, right? Cool!”
Seifer: “Shut up, chicken wuss.” *shoves him* “Let’s go.”
Zell: *flips out* “Don’t push me, Seifer!”
Ashley: “I hope there are no sharks, Seifer.” *snicker*
Seifer: “Shut up, Ashley.”
Noelle: “How did I get stuck with you guys?”
Ashley: “It was either this or go ‘chick hunting’ with Irvine and Reno.”
Noelle: “Ugh. You know what? I should have just stayed home and painted nails with Shell.”
(they get on the train, and it starts. everyone’s uncharacteristically silent as they look around for animals, but they don’t see anything but trees and grass and crap like that)
Noelle: “This blows.”
Ashley: “You were right. You really can’t see anything on this thing.”
Zell: “Oh man!”
Seifer: “I see stuff!”
Zell: *looks frantically* “Where?”
Seifer: *points in a random direction* “Over there. That’s the Purple-eating Ukranian Mongoose.”
Zell: “That looks like a tree.”
Seifer: “How dumb are you, chicken wuss? It’s right there!”
Zell: *straining* “I don’t see anything!!”
Ashley: “Uh, Seifer–“
(but seifer nudges her and sends her frantic ‘shut up’ signals as he grins evilly)
Noelle: *snicker* “Maybe this won’t be a total waste.”
Zell: “Where?!?! Where?!”
Seifer: “Aw, it ran away! Oh, but look!” *points randomly again* “There’s the Twelve tongued Bear Cabbage!”
Zell: “I don’t see it!”
Seifer: “Are you blind?? It’s right there!!”
Ashley: *quietly to Noelle* “This is so mean.”
Noelle: “But it’s so damn funny!”
Seifer: *points randomly* “Look! The North Antartican Chrono Lizard!!!”
Zell: “WHERE?!?!?!?!?!”
Noelle: *dying of laughter*
Ashley: *shrugs* “Oh well. Beats looking at shrubs.”
………………………………………………………………………………………..
(meanwhile, irvine and reno are wandering around, looking around, and looking kind of lost and hopeless)
Irvine: “Reno, where exactly did you read again that zoos are a good place to pick up chicks?”
Reno: “Uh… Maybe I made that up when I was drunk.”
Irvine: “Yeah. I think you did.”
(they watch as a five year old walks by with her mother and father)
Irvine: “Every girl here is like under fourteen or married already with like 10 kids!”
Reno: “And they don’t even sell beer here!”
Irvine: *turns to reno wide eyed* “You know what this means, don’t you?”
Both: “WE’VE FOUND HELL!!” *they scream and cling to one another*
……………………………………………………………………………………………
(meanwhile, back to seph and his ‘family’. they’re sitting at a table, eating popcorn. seph looks lifeless, hojo looks semi lifeless, and lucretia is trying to smile)
Lucretia: “What was your favorite animal so far, sweetie?”
Sephiroth: “The lions.”
Hojo: “Always did like cats, Sephiroth.”
Sephiroth: *glares at him* “I wanted a pet one, remember? But you wouldn’t get one for me.”
Hojo: “It wasn’t practical.”
Sephiroth: *snaps* “I was seven.”
Hojo: “You were too intelligent not to understand my reasons.”
Sephiroth: “I was *sev-ven*.”
Hojo: “You weren’t a child, Sephiroth.”
Sephiroth: *snaps* “Yes I was!”
Lucretia: “Sephiroth! Watch your mouth around your father!”
Sephiroth: “He’s not my father.” *gets up and glares at her* “And you’re not my mother.” *goes off*
(lucretia calls after him, but he doesn’t listen. lucretia turns to glare at hojo instead)
Lucretia: “What is wrong with you, Alexander?”
Hojo: “There was no room for a cat in the lab.”
Lucretia: “I’m not talking about the cat!” *sigh* “Go talk to him. Now.”
Hojo: “He won’t listen.”
Lucretia: “GO!”
(hojo blinks in surprise, then wordlessly gets up and follows seph. lucretia sighs and buries her head in her hands)
……………………………………………………………………………………
(meanwhile, the losers have come upon the seals)
Nida: “Hooray! Seals!!” *runs over to the edge*
Kuja: *proudly* “Look at all the people staring at me.”
Scarlet: “It’s called horror, freak.”
Heidegger: “Gya haa haa! Yummy seals!”
Nida: “You can’t eat the seals, jackass. But look!” *points excitedly* “You can feed them!! Let’s feed the seals!”
Scarlet: “Let’s not.” *yawn*
Kuja: “Ew…” *wrinkles up nose* “I don’t touch slimy, disgusting fish.”
Scarlet: “You’ll touch slimy disgusting Hojo.”
Kuja: “That’s for diamonds.”
Scarlet: “And yet *I’m* the whore.”
Heidegger: “Gya haa haa! I’ll feed the seals with you, Nida! Gya haa haa!”
Nida: “Hooray! This’ll be fun!”
(he skips away, and heidegger waddles after him)
Scarlet: “Five bucks says Heidegger feeds nothing but himself.”
Kuja: “And you make comments about *me* putting disgusting things into my mouth.”
…………………………………………………………………………..
(ew!! anyway, back on the train…)
Noelle: *whispers to Ashley* “Do you think Seifer’s taking his joke a little too far? We’ve been on this thing three times because Zell is determined to see something!”
Ashley: *whispers back* “Who cares? We get to sit down in the shade! Beats walking around smelling elephant crap!”
Seifer: “Look! There’s the Iron Matted Rock Puppy again!”
Zell: *frantically* “Dammit, where?!”
Seifer: “Aw! You missed it! It ducked behind some bushes!”
Zell: “Crap!”
Seifer: *points again* “But look! There’s the Spotted Reaching Monkey Owl!”
Zell: “WHERE?!?!”
Seifer: “Right there, chicken wuss! How can you be missing this?!?”
(zell frantically tries to see while seifer laughs it up behind his back, Ashley leans back with a smile)
Noelle: *sighs* “I’m just saying… Would it kill us to get out and look at the giraffes?”
…………………………………………………………………………………………
(meanwhile…as you will hopefully recall, sephiroth stomped off and hojo went after him. Now we see seph standing on a bridge over a small creek, leaning against a railing, and looking down into the water. hojo comes up to him)
Hojo: “You upset your mother.”
Sephiroth: “Go to hell. She’s not my mother.”
Hojo: “Then what is she?”
Sephiroth: *turns to look at him his eyes flashing* “Nothing more than the woman who gave birth to me. Other people may call her my mother, but I *never* will again. Just as you will *never* be my father.”
Hojo: “I never told you you were my son because I knew you would react badly.”
Sephiroth: “Do you blame me?” *glares at him* “You f**ked up bastard. You found a way to somehow hurt everything I cared about at one point or another. Just looking at you makes me want to vomit.”
Hojo: “But you must remember, Sephiroth. Without me, you would have never been created.”
Sephiroth: “Created?” *shoves hojo* “Yes, that’s right, isn’t it, you f**cking moron. I wasn’t *born*, I was *created*. I’m not your son, I’m your experiment. And you know what? With a ‘father’ like you–I’m glad of it.”
(hojo stares at him in shock, and seph walks past him a few paces when he turns back and speaks once more before walking away)
Sephiroth: “Good-bye, Hojo. Take some comfort in the fact that it probably hurts just as much to have your own creation hurt you, as it would your own son. But that is as close as you will ever get.”
……………………………………………………………………………………………
(meanwhile, back to reno and irvine, they’re both looking lifeless, sitting on a bench, passing a flask back and forth)
Reno: “Good thing I carry booze with me wherever I go, huh?”
Irvine: “You said it.”
Reno: “Too bad I’m out.” *holds it upside down*
Irvine: “Aw, damn. There goes our only form of entertainment.”
(they both pout a minute)
Reno: “There is *nothing* to do here.”
Irvine: “I know! I mean, is looking at animals supposed to be fun or something?”
Reno: “Hey, my motto says if it doesn’t involve booze and chicks, it’s boring.”
(there’s a long pause and then reno looks sideways at irvine)
Reno: “….You don’t think we’re shallow, do you?”
Irvine: “Hells no!”
Reno: *points* “Wait, Irvine! There’s a normal aged girl!!”
Irvine: *looks excitedly but makes a face* “Eh, her chest is too flat.”
Reno: *makes a face too* “Ugh, totally. I feel gross for even pointing her out.”
Irvine: “When do we get to leave?”
Reno: “Not soon enough.”
……………………………………………………………………………………..
(meanwhile, barret and cid are having a conversation, while red stands between them, a paw to his weary head…oh yea, and what the hell does ‘figyad’ mean? ‘figured’…you shall see below…)
Barret: “Aight, this is what we figyad out so far, yo!” *reads off a list* “He ain’t no sloth. He ain’t no buffalo. He ain’t no elephant. He ain’t no kangaroo rat. He ain’t even no panda bear!”
Cid: “@$%#$^^&%^*^^@%^&%^&%*!”
Barret: “Yeah, man! Not even no emu!”
Red: *sigh* “I told you.”
Barret: “We’s runnin’ outta options, yo!”
Red: “You are hurting my ears with your bad use of English.”
Cid: “$%^^%&&*^*&&%#^#$^^@#%^$&#%*!”
Barret: “Yo! You said it, Cid! Shut yo’ mouth, pack rat!”
Red: “…At least that beats a tree stump.”
Barret: “Yo! Maybe he be one of them things over there!”
(he and cid drag red over to where a lemur is caged)
Barret: “Maybe you be one of them lemurs!”
Red: “I think perhaps not.”
Barret and Cid: *stare at the lemur*
Lemur: *stares back*
Barret: “Yo, that thing be freakin’ me out.”
Cid: “@$%#$%^$&$*%@#^%#^!”
(they drag red away)
Barret: “Yo! I don’t believe dis! We been ’round dis whole damn zoo and we ain’t found nothin’ like this here cat/rat/moo we got.”
Red: “Why can’t you just address me by my name?”
Cid: “#$%^$#&^%$*$*$^%#$^%&*&$&@^!”
Barret: “Yo! You said it, Cid! Shu’ up, flapjack!”
………………………………………………………………………………………..
(meanwhile, back in the house of darkness….it’s still dark, and no one can see a thing…)
Lark: “You know, considering there are no animals in here, I think this building is closed.”
Tseng: “If only they locked it, we wouldn’t be wandering aimlessly inside.”
Reeve: “If only I had remembered a flashlight, we could find our way out.”
Vincent: *sigh* “I’m worried about my angel.”
Lark: “This sucks. I hate the zoo even more now.”
(there’s the sound of something small hitting the ground, and it rattles)
Lark: “What the hell was that?!”
Reeve: “I dropped my tic tacs. Just a second.”
(we can’t see anything, but apparently he has to let go of tseng’s hand to go find them.)
Reeve: “Where are they?”
Tseng: *sigh* “Let me help you, Reeve.”
(so he lets go of lark’s hand and drops down to help him. lark and vincent sigh)
Tseng: “Where are these damn–“
Reeve: “Ow!”
Tseng: “Oh! Sorry! Did I kneel on your hand?”
Reeve: “Yes.”
Tseng: “Aw! I’m sorry, sweetheart.” *kisses reeve’s hand…apparently*
Lark: “Aw, they’re so cu—!!”
(vincent starts to drag her away before she can finish the sentence.)
Lark: “Vincent!”
Vincent: “They’ll find their own way out…eventually.”
Lark: *pouts* “Now the day is a total loss.”
Vincent: “I believe I see some light over there.”
(and sure enough, they have found the exit! they also hear some quiet crying, and they look at one another in confusion and go outside to see sephiroth sitting against the wall, knees drawn to his chest, crying quietly)
Vincent and Lark: “Angel!/Sephiroth!”
(they both kneel down next to him)
Vincent: “What happened, angel?”
Sephiroth: “Go away… Don’t talk to me.”
Lark: “Sephiroth, don’t be stupid. What happened?”
Sephiroth: “I hate these people who claim to be my parents, that’s what happened! No matter what anyone wants to believe, I was *created*, not born, They’re not really my parents. They’re just scientists. A real parent is someone who raises and loves their child. Not one who runs away or abuses them. But then again, I’m barely a human being anyway.”
Lark: “That’s not true! Don’t talk like that!”
Vincent: “Angel, Lucretia gave birth to you like any child is born. Just because you were injected with Jenova does not mean you were ‘created’.”
Sephiroth: “That’s not what *he* sees me as.”
Vincent: “Forget Hojo. He deserves to be hated. But Lucretia… Forgive her, Sephiroth, even if you don’t want to call her your mother. She loves you. She really does.”
Sephiroth: *hangs his head* “………….”
Vincent: “I think you owe it to her to tell her what you’re feeling.”
Sephiroth: “……………”
Vincent: “Come on, angel.” *helps him to his feet* “Go on, now.”
(sephiroth gives them both a tearful look, but he does leave. lark stands up)
Lark: “I feel so terrible.”
Vincent: *looks at her* “Why?”
Lark: “Because…he’s so needy, and I… I can’t help him at all.”
Vincent: “That’s not true.”
(but before lark can say anything else, reeve and tseng emerge from the house of darkness, both looking a little…rumpled)
Lark: *blinks* “*That* was fast.”
Tseng: *uncomfortably* “Yeah, well, we didn’t really get to do anything.”
Reeve: *bitterly* “It’s so damn dark in there.”
Vincent: *sigh* “My poor angel.”
Lark: “Okay, I think it’s time we all went home and….relaxed. Let’s go find the others.”
……………………………………………………………………………..
(meanwhile, back to the losers…)
Heidegger: “Gya haa haa! Fishy fishy!” *eats a handful of fish*
Nida: *trying to stop him* “No! Those are for the seals!”
Scarlet: “You owe me five bucks, Kuja.”
Kuja: “I do not. I never went against your bet.”
Scarlet: “Damn. I could really use that money.”
Nida: “You’re making the seals mad, Heidegger!”
Heidegger: “Gya haa haa! Let them find their own food!”
(then a few seagulls nearby take notice of heidegger and his fish. they fly over, land on him, and try to eat the fish)
Heidegger: “No! Mine! Gya haa haa!!”
(he runs around frantically, trying to shake the birds off him. nida runs after him, waving his arms around and whining about the seals. scarlet sighs and lights a cigarette, and kuja takes out a compact to fix his makeup)
Scarlet: “Do you think we’re lucky enough to have the seagulls tear out his tongue?”
Kuja: “What do you think?”
Scarlet: “No way in hell.”
………………………………………………………………………………………..
(meanwhile, hojo goes back over to lucretia. she looks at him expectantly as he sits)
Hojo: “Give it up, Lucretia. Your fairy tale life is an impossibility.”
Lucretia: “What happened?”
Hojo: “He hates us both. And this entire situation is making me uncomfortable.”
Lucretia: “He’s your *son*, Alexander–“
Hojo: “I never treated him like he was. And he doesn’t consider himself as such. You can’t heal him, Lucretia. No one can.”
Lucretia: “Because of what *you* did to him!”
Hojo: “Because of what we *both* did to him! *Don’t* try and act like you had no part in it!”
Lucretia: *sighs and hangs her head* “I thought… I thought we could all put the past behind us.”
Hojo: “You were mistaken.” *he gets up* “I don’t regret anything, Lucretia.”
(he walks away, and lucretia rests her head in her hands. she doesn’t cry, and she just remains still. sephiroth approaches slowly from the back, coming around to the chair hojo has just vacated. he stands behind it.)
Sephiroth: “Lucretia.”
(she looks up at him in surprise)
Lucretia: “Sephiroth? Oh… I didn’t think you ever wanted to see me again.”
Sephiroth: *shakes his head* “I can’t be what you want me to be. I can’t pretend I feel comfortable around you when I can still summon up this hate.”
Lucretia: *sniff* “I suppose I can understand that.”
Sephiroth: “I can never forgive Hojo. The horrible things he has done go far beyond what he’s done to only me. But you…” *he leans a little closer to her* “You didn’t hurt me deliberately. With time… I may be able to call you mother and mean it.”
Lucretia: *crying* “Oh, Sephiroth.”
(he gives in and hugs her, and she kisses the top of his head)
Lucretia: “I just want you to be happy, Sephiroth. That’s all I ever wanted. I’ll give you time. As much time as you need.”
(sephiroth shuts his eyes and a single tear slips down his cheek)
Sephiroth: “Thank you.”
………………………………………………………………………………………
(back to the losers… the four are sitting on the bench. scarlet’s still smoking, kuja looks annoyed and tries to edge away from heidegger and nida, who are both covered in fish guts and feathers)
Heidegger: “Gya haa haa! I hate birds!”
Nida: “And I hate you, jackass!”
Scarlet: “And I hate both of you, so shut up!”
Kuja: “I never thought I’d care… But I hope Hojo returns. At least he shows me the attention I deserve.”
Scarlet: “Ew! If I didn’t know better I’d think you actually liked him.”
Kuja: “Give me some credit.” *flips hair back*
(speak of the devil….hojo comes towards them, looking surly and unhappy. he stops and stands in front of them, silent a moment)
Kuja: “Goodness! Finally!” *gets up and clings to hojo* “I need a shower. Please tell me we’re going home.”
Hojo: “We are.” *slips an arm around kuja’s waist and starts leading him away*
Scarlet: “Geez. What’s up his ass?”
Heidegger: “Gya haa haa! I think we know that one!”
Nida: *covers ears* “Ew!! My virgin ears!!”
…………………………………………………………………………………………
(meanwhile…everyone has gathered back at the zoo entrance. irvine and reno look lifeless, barret and cid look thoughtful, and red looks sad. zell looks annoyed, seifer looks pleased with himself, and Ashley and Noelle just look kinda bored. tseng and reeve look restless, vincent looks sad, and lark looks thoughtful)
Barret: “Yo… I don’t believe it. Nothin’ in dis whole zoo looks like dis here….thing.”
Cid: “@$%#$^$#&&$&#@%!”
Red: “Oh, what a life I’m forced to lead.”
Seifer: “Hey, you know what he kinda reminds me of?”
Barret: “What, foo?”
Seifer: “The Iron Matted Rock Puppy we saw on the train, right, Zell?” *zell hangs his head* “Oh right. You didn’t see it!!”
Barret: “Yo! Dat sound right to you, Iron Matted Rock Puppy?”
Red: “No, but I doubt that will stop you.”
Ashley: “So, Irvine, Reno, how did the chick hunting go?”
Both: *shudder* “We are never coming to the zoo again.”
Noelle: “We spent the whole time on that damn train. I didn’t even get to see the giraffes!”
Reeve: *mutters* “If only I had had a damn flashlight…”
Tseng: “You have everything else we needed in there.” *sigh* “Lark, are we leaving now?”
Lark: “Just as soon as Sephiroth gets back.”
(she turns and looks at vincent, who is staring at the crowd, looking for sephiroth)
Lark: “Vincent…?”
(he turns to look at her, raising an eyebrow)
Lark: “I… I’m really sorry. I feel horrible.”
(he goes to say something, but before the words can come out, sephiroth comes up to them, looking emotionless)
Vincent: “Angel, how are you? Did everything go well?”
Sephiroth: “Fine.” *grabs lark by the wrist and starts dragging her away* “Let’s go home.”
Lark: “Wait! Sephiroth!”
(she turns back and looks at vincent, who just stands there, looking sad and rejected. everyone else starts to uncertainly follow lark and sephiroth out of the zoo, and vincent is the last to move)
Vincent: *thinks* Don’t feel horrible, Lark, just because I do.”
THE END
or is it?
The Rambles Live! 